Yesterday at the supermarket I was approached by what seemed to be a barely functional half-tard. Whether his deficit was emotional, mental or physical I could not tell but he apparently knew me and was thrilled to see me after so long. Fearing the mysterious yet powerful strength his kind often posses es I entertained his notions and engaged in small talk while purchasing a coffee. After hearing all about his cell phone and his "girlfriend" I wished him a prosperous future and continued my shopping. I needed meat.
The last 3 times I have been to Stop and Shop this has happened with 3 different tards. Some more complete in their retardation than others. I had a woman tell me that Sharon was pretty and that she married her husband for the money because her parent couldn't afford to take care of her tard needs. I had a strange man with coke-bottle glasses talk to me about his medication and yesterday my long lost friend discuss his cell phone with me.
Do I give off some sort of tard attracting pheromone? Am I helping out the tards through some sleep walking charity work? Am I myself retarded and my daily work life and weekend activities are really all delusions while I rock back and forth in a puddle of feces on a cement floor?
Maybe they all just want to be wrangled and know who the tardwrangler is?
It's tard rodeo time.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
I called someone retarded the other day at work and apparently this girl was offended because her sister is retarded...ok, sorry.
Hours later at a meeting she tells people that her sister is autistic. There is a goddamn difference! She shouldn't be whining and getting offended, she should have her wheeled up next to the blackjack table.
the end
I think something in your attitude makes them think you're kin.
Post a Comment